Apr 2020

Mickey's Mechanical House

Today spaces are expected to operate in highly sophisticated ways; so does the technology and infrastructure that we deploy to sustain our electrical dreams. Yet the more complex the space, the less of an open system it becomes for the end user who is purposefully distanced from the mechanics that sustain the spectre of automation. This project takes this condition to the extreme by imagining a world where everything follows the "no user serviceable parts inside" dogma.

—user765 says:

The couch glitched today.

Or, maybe, yesterday; I can’t be sure.

Anyway, that damn thing is useless. The textures had started failing since last Wednesday and now it is stuck in default mode. I’ve checked the main system of the house but everything seems to be working fine –my bed’s sleeping tracking mode runs great, the desk shifts from marble to wood like the first day I bought it and the noise control filter of my walls is even blocking that 11pm washing machine my lovely neighbor puts on every single freaking night. Point being – main system does not need debugging, the apartment is fairly new (built in 2063), network is stable and I can’t do a third reboot in just a week because I’ll def get evicted.

>quoting user765
—user765 says:

Update: Just noticed tiny glitches on the walls’s textures too, currently freaking out. And the highlight glossiness seems a bit off, kinda blotchy. Hope they don’t fail anytime soon. This is so annoying –feels like my sight is getting blurry, kinda being dizzy. I’m setting everything back to default. Hopefully not for too long –this neutral greyish blueish thing all around me is super boring. And this never changing mountain landscape…freaking lame. And The Company does absolutely nothing about it – like I have another choice or something! What a waste of well earned credits.

I’m taking the matter into my own hands but it is impossible to open this thing up. I can’t even find a single screw to unscrew. A coworker mentioned the other day something about this site so I’m coming here for help. I am pretty fluent in C# and Xica43.2 and used to make physical models back in Junior High, lol. I am ready to jump on this new tinkering train, pretty stoked about making something from scratch and really don’t care about the fines from the big guys; screw them –I just want a couch that does not glitch every single day.

>quoting user765
—User00221 says:

tldr; let me guess – it’s the MiddleX couch, isn’t it? This glitch has brought so much attention to our community. I swear we may need to turn it into “invite only”.

I get it though, I joined a year ago because of the huge data breach of the Karel Espresso Machine; a man can only stand a certain level of The Company’s spam in their home Wall PANORAMA® system playing 24/7, you know what I mean?

Making that damn coffee machine from scratch though was not easy. So be prepared to not have a decent couch for the next couple of months (the couch will be way easier to make –only takes some wild imagination– the IRL materials though will take you some time for sure). But people around here made entire walls from scratch (initially glitching because of air traffic, lol), so anything is possible I guess.

Anyway, since I get that you are a nooby, cute beginner, I’ve attached the code for a very simple couch. For IRL materials you’ll need to post to other threads to see if someone wants to trade in your area or dm me to see if I know anyone close to you. Plus, tools –I assume you have none; that’s a bit tricky, you’ll need to figure this one on your own. I’d find the let’s say ~less legal~ IRL market close to your place and pay a visit to one of the South bars. You can even try the sideway exits of the Purple Lane. If lucky enough, you can find pretty decent scrap gems over there. Just be mindful of the local tinkerers and the technogypsies. They are up for a tough bargain. Remember to never mention anything too clearly and always go for alternative names –best advice I was given e v e r, saved my ass a couple of times right there.

PS: Don’t worry about any fines. Everything we do is untraceable and datafree, no one will keep an eye on your couch –just make sure you don’t raise suspicions while you are gathering tools and IRL materials. Run the code once you are done and make sure you get “April is a cruel month” at the end –this will validate that nothing has changed within the house’s central system and the recipe is still running incognito. We also have a script for bugging the central Wall PANORAMA® code while you are tinkering around –totally blocking surveillance and recording, but just for a while. Look it up.

Last thing but very important. We have an archive of objects from the past. Find those to be good hint references, just to trigger one’s imagination. We try to do our best with collecting and documenting whatever found from the past. You will notice lots of random stuff that we have no clue what their function used to be.

See below instances of the couch script, just to get an idea. You will find the basic recipe script attached. Collect the most random, craziest IRL materials and improvise for whatever else you feel like building. You can always find more specific scripts on our site. But my advice is to experiment -one can only be surprised by what comes up in the process.

using System.IO;
using System.Collections;
namespace ChairProjectRecipy
{
class ProgramRecipy

{static void TinkerMe(string[ ] args)
{
int[] arr = new int[5] { 83, 12, 3, 34, 60 };
int i;
for (i = 0; i < 5; i++)
//go to your nearest control box of your Wall PANORAMA® installation. At the connection between the box and the led, there is a small hole. Place your phone’s safety pin and gently push – it unlocks the replacement battery box. The box has four Type A screws, right below the main speaker (thumbs up MakerBoy43 for the tip). Use these screws for securing the cushion in position.
{
Console.WriteLine(“A Game of Chess”);
}
private void serialPort1_DataReceived(object sender, System.IO.Ports.SerialDataReceivedEventArgs e)
{
TestText = serialPort1.ReadExisting();
string[] nameArray = TestText.Split (‘*’);
foreach (string name in nameArray)
{
dot = nameArray[0];
Rx1 = nameArray[1];
Ry1 = nameArray[2];
}
//To pick the entire box out, you need to gently push the box to the left. You’ll inevitably ruin some of the surrounding pixels. Screw them all we say. Pull the box out, break the connections and dismantle it (good IRL material for welding and future soldering, keep batteries. For the couch, you’ll just need the springs. There is a box every 40sqf of Wall PANORAMA®. Collect the springs, weld them together (kudos to @Lia14).
Console.WriteLine(“The Fire Sermon”);
}
else
{
//break the top left corner of your 3D Food Printer with a fork and dismantle one catridge_it will still work fine worry not_both companies use the same factory. You’ll find 6 screws Type B, work fine.
Console.WriteLine(“Screw You Alexa”);
}
//glue is tricky_run the “Grandma’s Delicious Pie®” recipe in your 3D Food Printer and on the 8’ open the lid and stick a fork below the cartridge to stop the process. Ignore the red light_your Alexa Eternal® may start yelling at you and go straight into “Danger” mode so make sure you have activated the Noise Control Mode of your Wall Panorama® to not get evicted. Leave the printed mix to cool down. Add some coke for extra durability.
{
Console.WriteLine(“April Is The Cruelest Month”)
}
private void timer1_Tick(object sender, EventArgs e)
{
label3.Text = dot;
posY.Text = Ry1;
posX.Text = Rx1;
}
}
}
}

>quoting user00221
—User765 says:


00221 zillion thanks. The materials I managed to gather are so weirdly off but so surprisingly useful. Had to face some challenges with the technogypsies but so far so good. And your bugging tips are insane! I am already deep into scriptotinkering. So far I’ve built stuff like tables with legs, lighting machines, planting hubs, even this thing for exercising my booties. They are all over my place, becoming super obsessed with their potentials. And ohhh, this extruded buttons…absolutely loving the feeling of pressing those. I made something like a keyboard for an old-school laptop. I needed that one for scripting without interventions from the house’s Wall Panorama® system –was facing some difficulties with properly bugging the central system. Found the solution to be building my own pc, controlling the inner components and brain of my system –super tough synthesizing those chips from scrap metals but proudly succeeded! Physical modeling skills back from Junior High days have proven useful after all.

Damn, having control over things around me is such a feeling!

P.S. currently working on some cool recipe for tracing and blocking deepfake textures of Alexa33. Will hit you up soon!